Saturday, April 14, 2012

Wouldn't It Be Nice If...Babies Came With Extended Warranties?

Being a new parent is a nerve racking experience!  From that baby's first cry to the day they leave the nest at 18 (or whatever age they finally are "FREE TO FLY)...there are so many times an EXTENDED Warranty would be so nice!

Your brand new baby is crying for hours and you can't seem to fix it - Dial 1-800-HELPMEE and your warranty covers all repairs and fixes the issue immediately!  The baby is soothed, comforted and sound asleep in your arms or bed (whichever you prefer)!

Your toddler throws themselves on the ground in a fit of rage and anger...and counting to 10 is not working for either of you - Dial 1-800-HELPMEE and your warranty calms your child down, gives you a hug and finds a positive way to resolve everything in a matter of seconds! 

Your adolescent doesn't want to do their homework and their grades are barely hanging in there - Dial 1-800-HELPMEE and your warranty covers all tutoring and study help, which causes your child to immediately become a straight A student who loves to read and finds every opportunity for learning!

Your teen comes home with a broken heart, because their boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't want to "be with them" anymore - Dial 1-800-HELPMEE and your warranty offers you a cure to their brokenheartedness!

and FINALLY...your now adult child is leaving the nest and trying their wings out for the first time and they are finding that life is a lot harder than they ever imagined.  WE all have warped ideas of what it's like to be an adult when we are children...because we have no idea...Dial 1-800-HELPMEE and your child will be offered their own LIFETIME WARRANTY, (that they, themselves, can pay for) that will provide them with all the answers they need to make it through the rest of their life!

Oh...wouldn't that be nice?